cartoon physics

Ted the Animator: “How ‘not getting’ are we talking, here?”

Carl the Animator: “Gimme a script confusion scale.”

Ted the Animator: “Uhhhhh… from ‘Waiting for Guffman’ to ‘Santa Claus & The Ice Cream Bunny.’”

Carl the Animator: “Hmm… middling. Sort of a ‘Winnebago Man outtakes.’”

Ted the Animator: “Well, what’s the problem?”

Carl the Animator: “Y’know the heavy bag of treasure?”

Ted the Animator: “Mmhmm?”

Carl the Animator: “The one filled with solid gold, jewels, and other massively-dense objects?

Ted the Animator: “Yeah, there was even somethin’ like an elephant tusk in an earlier scene.”

Carl the Animator: “See anything out of the ordinary?”

Ted the Animator: “…well, the bottom of the bag sorta gets cut off above the ripples.”

Carl the Animator: “No, like… it’s being flung around like it’s full of ping-pong balls.”

Ted the Animator: “Oh. Oh! Ohhhhhhh.”

Carl the Animator: “Yyyeah.”

Ted the Animator: “I guess Scooby-Doo plots are so crazy, I, uh… sorta zone out on the logic half the time.”

Carl the Animator: “I mean, the entire evil scheme depends a sack of metals floating, and being launched up 8 feet by a wave.”

Ted the Animator: “Imagine if the plan went off, and after the treasure sack is dropped in the river, it just… plunged straight to the bottom.”

Carl the Animator: “Yeah, when he goes to pick it up, even the bad guy’s face seems to say ‘duuuuuude! holy crap, guys…’”

Carl the Animator: “’…there’s *no way* that actually worked.’”

Ted the Animator: “Hey, the guy gets the scale! He knows a ‘Santa Claus & The Ice Cream Bunny’ script when he sees one.”